


Comfort and Joy

by Annejackdanny



Category: SG-1 - Fandom
Genre: Christmas, DD and Dak, Fluff, M/M, doll fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-17
Updated: 2013-12-17
Packaged: 2018-01-04 23:01:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 17,621
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1086696
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Annejackdanny/pseuds/Annejackdanny
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jack kept his feeling for Daniel under wraps for years and never intended to come out... a mission to 'Santa Planet' not only changes his mind, but will also turn the lives of both men upside down forever. Beware of aliens bearing gifts :) </p><p>Beware: This fic is gen-rated, but involves the coming out and falling in love of two men. Also involves kissing and snuggling and the mention of shower sex (not graphic or anything in detail). I rated it gen, because it's mostly just fluffy holiday stuff and involves cute plush dolls.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Comfort and Joy

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Katxander](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Katxander).



> If you know Katxander's awesome DD and Dak cartoons, you'll also know her dollies. She made a pair for me and a dear friend very early on after she started creating these little wonders of love. I wrote this doll-story a couple years back but never shared it aside from the Little Danny Yahoo group. I have no time to write a holiday fic this year, so this is my contribution - I polished it up a bit, too. 
> 
> If you don't know Katxander's work you really should take a look at her Stargate babies. You will find her cartoons here. She has a terrific sense of humor and she not only has a Jack and Danny baby, she also has a little John and Rodney ... and many lovely and cute OCs like Pat, the bunny and Khufu, the camel. 
> 
> Whether you love kidfic or not - these will charm you into loving them!
> 
> http://ddanddaksworld.tumblr.com/

**Comfort and Joy**

**A Jack/Daniel story featuring DD and Dak**

  
  


**Prologue**

I crack open one eye and lie totally still, listening to the distant noises coming from somewhere in the house.

The point of origin is most likely the kitchen.

Which is bad.

But I'm getting used to this, so I don't bolt out of bed to investigate what's going on right away.

Instead I glance at the clock, grab my second pillow and slam it over my face.

It's six o' friggin' clock in the morning.

On my day off.

I used to like to sleep in on my day off even if “sleeping in” only meant 8:00. 

Now I'm out and about between six and seven and tearing my hair out around eight. For the first time. There's lots of tearing of hair recently. And counting to ten. And the need for a stiff drink in the evenings.

There's a crash and a squeal and the chatter of little voices. 

“Dak! Yoo awen't s'posed to cawwy the hot coffee pot! Look what yoo did?”

Oh-kay, this is not good. I better stop suffocating on my pillow and go investigate.

“Sowee, Danny. Aye iss jus' helping, yanno? Big Dak likes his coffee in de mownings.”

“But now iss all ovva the floor! And yoo soaked in its!”

I have an instant picture of doom in my mind as I trudge across the hallway and enter the kitchen.

Why me? 

I gawk at the Lake Tahoe sized coffee puddle on my kitchen floor and the little guy sitting in it. His fuzzy gray hair sticks out in all direction and his beady brown eyes blink at me. How he can blink with those eyes is beyond me, but he can. 

“Mownin' Big Dak,” he greets me. “Weee maded yoo coffee.”

“Aye did. He wuined it,” the other squirt sitting on the kitchen counter informs me regretfully. His eyes are beads, too, but they are blue and he's wearing wire framed glasses just like his real... his big version. I'm not supposed to call them “not real”, because they are. Real, that is. Very, very, real. 

I scrub a hand through my sleep-messy hair – I'm sure it looks just like Baby Dak's … Jack's... hair – and take in the open cabinet doors and the trail of Froot Loops on my counter and floor. Some are victims of the coffee lake, looking like donut-shaped sponges now.

“Wee twied to make yoo bweakfast,” Danny says. “Dis iss no easy. Ewewything's too big.”

“We talked about doing stuff around the house, right?” I say as I gingerly step around the coffee lake, spiked with pieces of glass, and close the cabinet doors. 

“But wee jus' wanned to help,” Baby Jack pouts. “Now Aye'ss all wet.” 

I bent and pick up the coffee soaked little thing. His tiny blue BDU pants are wet, so are his plushy stuffed little butt and sock-clad feet. Janet thinks they're made of some kind of velour, only that it's not really velour, but something alien. Since they come from another planet, that's kind of obvious. Fraiser, who tested and prodded the poor guys, couldn't figure out what makes them tick. There's no reason, no logical way of explaining why two 12-inch plush dolls we found on an alien world are alive and as chipper as the chipmunks. 

Of course there's the other little issue of these dolls being cute baby-like copies of me and Daniel.

I carry Baby Jack over to the table and examine his sodden limbs and clothes. “Someone needs a bath,” I say, raising my eyebrows.

“Noooooooooooo,” the doll squeaks and tries to wiggle out of my hands. He likes baths. The drying is what's bugging him. I would remove his clothes to stick them into the washer, but they're sewn on them. 

“Sorry, buddy,” I say. “You'll also sit on the heater afterwards to dry properly.”

“But diss iss mean. Yoo saided you'd take us inoo de fowest today. Yoo saided it was a suwpwife,” Baby Jack mutters around the thumb in his mouth. 

“I know. But if you're staying wet your innards start molding and we don’t want that, do we? So unless you wanna be tumble dried, we'll have to do our little trip in the afternoon. Which isn't really a problem. There'll still be plenty of time to do what we were going to do.”

His brown button eyes widen. I don't know how the hell he's doing that. “Iss dat like wollew coastew wides? Can Aye twea?”

Oy. I should have known. After all this squirt is more like me than I would like him to be. “It might, but I won't take any chances. You could lose your eyes or hair in the dryer.” Besides Daniel is going to kill me if he finds out I stuck Baby Jack into the dryer. 

“But if it if faftew,” he argues.

“It might be faster, but it's dangerous,” I say. Why am I even arguing with a doll? I turn to make sure Danny is still sitting on the counter.

He isn't.

He has climbed down the cupboards and has waddled over to the kitchen table where he's trying to climb a chair. I reach down and scoop him up with my free hand so he can sit next to his doll buddy. His brother, I correct myself. Dak and Danny are brothers. That's what they told us when we found them. Then they attached themselves like unmovable limpets to my legs and demanded to go “home”.

Which is where we are now.

“You two stay here,” I tell them sternly. “Don't move until I've cleaned up the mess. Understood?”

They stare at me and then salute in unison. It's something they started doing right away from day one and I have learned to trust the salute to mean; Yes, sir. 

“Good.” I wipe down the floor with kitchen towels, grab a broom and clean up the Froot Loops and what's left of my coffee pot. Once everything is in the trash I make sure there is no glass on the floor that can get stuck in plushy little feet – or big real feet – and finally go to find the phone.

It's hidden in my cabinet in the living room. My little guys like to make phone calls. I nearly had a stroke when my latest phone bill arrived. There were several long distant calls to Tucson, AZ and Germany – I have no idea whom they called and during my interrogation they could only tell me there were two very nice ladies on the phone who were happily chatting with them. I let it drop. It wasn't a matter of national security so I didn't try to track those calls, but I locked away the phone. 

Naturally I call Daniel, forgetting how early it still is. He might be a night owl but once he sleeps he's not happy to be disturbed in his slumber. Tough. I suffer, he suffers. So, there. 

“'lo, wha' 'ime is it?” he mumbles into the phone when I cheerfully greet him.

“Six-thirty. Rise and shine, Danny-boy.”

“Rise and shine my...” he cracks a yawn, then smacks his lips. “Wha's up?”

“Need to postpone the trip. Baby Jack took a bath in coffee. Don't ask. He's fine, just very wet.” 

“Oh. You want me to call Sam and Teal'c?” He sounds slightly more awake now. 

“Nah, we can do that later when they're awake,” I say graciously and can almost see the scowl he's sending me. “I've got two dollies to entertain though. Wanna come over for breakfast?”

“Now?” There's definitely a whine.

“Shower, dress, bring your coffee pot. Mine is broken. Oh, and bagels would be nice,” I order with a grin.

“I'll bring my laptop,” he mutters. “If we don't do the tree buying this morning, I might as well work.”

“You can try,” I say knowingly.

He sighs. “Give me an hour.”

“Iss Big Danwell coming?” Danny asks as he pushes his glasses up. He doesn't need the glasses, but he doesn’t even take them off at nights when he's tucked away in the little dolly bed the squirts sleep in. Fraiser had sewn a double sleeping bag for them to keep them warm at nights.

“Yep, he is.” I pick up Baby Jack and hoist him onto my left arm. He can sit comfortably in the crook, snuggling against my chest. “Wanna come with us?” I ask Baby Danny and he nods his plushy head. His hair is brown-ish and not as fuzzy as Jack's. His blue button eyes always seem to sparkle with happiness while Jack's brown ones have a slightly cheeky expression. Go figure. 

I put Danny on my right arm and off we go to the bathroom. 

I carefully sit the boys … I can't just always refer to them as dolls... down. Danny on the toilet seat, Jack on the rug in front of the bathtub. I run lukewarm water into the sink and pour a generous amount of baby shampoo into it. I have learned a few things early. Soapy water – with lots of soap and little water – cleans almost everything off the squirts. They can't get too wet, but it helps to rub them down with a soft washcloth. 

The shampoo turns into huge amounts of foam and Baby Danny jumps to his feet and starts hopping up and down. “Bubble bath, bubble bath!” he exclaims and almost falls from the toilet. I grab him by the arm and he joins his buddy on the floor.

When the sink is full of foam I take Baby Jack and the washcloths and start rubbing his legs and behind gently.

“Diss iss fun,” he decides and his soft little hands start batting at the bubbles, making them dance and soar and generate another kind of mess. “Big Dak!” he crows happily. “Diss be better den goin' toe de woods!”

“Ah, you don't know that yet. Wait till we're there.”

“Wee still goe?” Danny asks from the floor. “Weally?”

“Yep, just later. Hold your legs still, Jack,” I say, tightening my hold around him. “If you fall into the sink you’ll be even more wet and need much longer to dry. Remember?”

We've been there, done that, got the t-shirt.

He stills for a moment. “Oh, okaea.” Then he starts batting at the bubbles again while his little brother is giggling and squealing from where he sits on the rug. Some of the bubbles find their way down there and Danny is on his feet chasing them.

I can't help it. I laugh with them.

That's what they do. Besides making me tear out my hair. They're making me laugh. Everyone says that's a good thing and I agree. 

I pick Baby Jack up and take a dry towel to towel him off. Then I sit on the toilet seat and stand him on my thighs, holding on to his hands, so we can talk man to man. “I'm going to have to put you on the heater now, Jack,” I say in my best daddy voice. It's funny how things like that come back to you when you need them. Daddy-voices, reading stories, holding hands and cuddling little bodies. Cleaning up various messes, playing games and finding toys in the most interesting places... even though the toys are Baby Born sized now. 

Baby Jack nods his head. “Aye knooow,” he drawls.

“And you have to stay there, okay? For as long as it takes.”

“But is iss taking a vewwy looooongest time,” he whines.

“And you knew you can't carry a full coffee pot, didn't you?” I inquire.

“Ah-huh.”

“But Aye'ss was going to help him an' he jus' was too fast,” Danny jumps in. He can't see his brother getting into trouble without trying to help, with the trouble or the consequences. Whichever happens to be more urgent at the moment. 

“Then you can join Jack on the heater,” I offer. “And you two can think about how to avoid getting wet or dirty in the future. How's that?”

Jack pouts around his thumb and I can swear I see his eyes getting teary, which can't be. Right? Danny gets up and comes over to hug my leg. “Dak iss vewwy sowee,” he assures me.

“Aye iff de moft sowwieft,” he agrees, nodding his sewn on head.

I am screwed. They know how to play me. Heck, they probably know I'm not really mad. I'm just trying to keep up the act, to at least pretend I have some control here. “You have to be dried,” I tell Baby Jack. Which is true. There's no way around it. But... “I could use the hair dryer...”

“YEF!” He tries to jump up and down on my thighs, but I hold him in place. 

“Only if you promise not to make me coffee anymore. Or play boat in the kitchen sink. Or try to bury Danny in the flower beds so he can play artifact.” All this has happened in the four weeks the squirts have been living with me. I know a hundred things to add, but I don't want them to get any ideas so I stop there.

He nods solemnly. “Pwomise,” he says. I look down my nose at Danny. 

“Aye pwomise to watch him betta,” Danny says with dignity.

I bite my tongue to keep in the chuckle. 

“Aye pwomise to not do those fings too,” Danny adds after another look at me.

“Let's seal it,” I say. Danny climbs up my knee and they each shake one of my fingers to make it a done deal. 

Until they forget about it in a day or two. But for now we're good. I pick up Baby Jack and reach for the hair dryer. The squirt clamps both hands over his tiny ears and stretches out his legs so I can dry them better. 

I turn the hair dryer on and it starts howling. Then there's a loud “Poof” accompanied by smoke as a flame shoots out of it.

I throw the dryer into the sink and jump backwards, pressing the startled doll against my body. 

“Poof!” Danny says, his eyes round and impressed behind those glasses.

My hands tremble slightly as I examine Baby Jack for burns or other injuries. “Are you okay, kiddo?”

“WOW,” the object of my worries exclaims. He even pulls out his thumb. “Dat was so COOL! Doe it again, Big Dak?”

“I’d rather not,” I mutter and pull the plug of the hairdryer. “I guess it's back to the heater, Jack. Sorry.” At least he can't get a cold or something. Just mold. Which is icky, but avoidable. 

Danny climbs up my leg until he's sitting on my hip. He's like a little monkey, that one. 

Both dollies securely wrapped into my arms we head back into the kitchen. I settle them on the window sill and get out a dishtowel to put on the heater. It's more comfortable that way. I leave Danny on the sill and put Jack on the heater which is right in front of the window, too. That way both of them can look out into the garden and chat with each other. 

“Look, Dak! There's a biwedy! A pwetty one!”

“If Aye had my gun Aye couldda shoot it,” the sensible little guy says.

“Dak!” Danny squeaks.

“Aye'ss jus' kiddin'.” Dak giggles and I shake my head and check my fridge to see if there's enough milk for Daniel's coffee and something to put on the bagels he'll bring. Then I start reading the morning paper.

For about five minutes.

“Boooowwwweeeed,” Baby Jack informs me. He has stretched out on his back and is staring at the ceiling while Danny’s still pressing his face against the window to watch the pwetty biwedy. 

“You want the cartoon section?” I ask absently while making my way through the sport section.

“YAY!”

I sigh and get a pair of scissors from the cupboard. I start cutting the cartoon page into strips so he can hold the comics in his hands without being buried underneath the paper. There's not much space to move on the heater by the window so it's better to hand him the cartoons in pieces than having him fight with the giant paper pages. 

When I'm done he eagerly reaches for them and I have another five minutes of quiet before Danny asks me if he can read something too. “Wait for Jack to be done with the cartoons. Then you can read them,” I say.

“Aye don' wanna wead cawtoons,” he informs me. 

“What do you want to wead... read?” I ask, clucking my tongue at the Cannucks loosing the third game in a row. Daniel won't be happy with this. He pretends he hates hockey. But he has a liking for the Cannucks.

“Sumfink awchwologiqual,” he says. “Ow sumfink 'bout biwedies.”

For a moment I think about the miracle that both kids are being able to read but never pronounce words properly. “Danny,” I say. “It's birrrrd, not biwed.” I won't torture both of us by trying to make him say archaeological right.

He turns to me and blinks. “Biwed, iss what I saed, Big Dak.”

“Never mind,” I sigh. “There's nothing about birds in the paper. But I can get you one of my National Geographics. You have to come and read them here at the table though. I'm not going to cut them into handy pieces.” 

“YAHOO!” He tries to climb over his brother and almost falls from the sill. My reflexes are still fast enough to leap out of my chair and catch him before he hits ground. He wouldn't break anything, he probably wouldn't even get a scratch – but I won't take any chances. Besides, for some reason they react like real kids when they fall or bump into things too hard. The reason for that is probably that they get startled and need the comfort. 

I put him in the middle of the table and shake my finger at him as I tell him to stay and sit. I get the salute and he patiently waits until I'm back with the magazine. Now we get to see the ritual of Danny-reading. 

I flip through the pages until he finds something he wants to read. He can do that himself, but it takes a lot longer for the squirt to move the pages on his own. Then I put the magazine on the table and Danny plops on his butt, smack in the middle of the page and starts reading. I'm wondering how big the letters are to him, from the perspective he has. But apparently he doesn't have trouble with that. As he reads on he runs down the page until he's flipping over on his hands and knees to read the last lines. Then the same starts all over again on the next page. And he has this Daniel-ish expression on his pudgy little face even though his eyes are buttons and his mouth looks like it's painted on. It's not – he can talk. But it looks like it. 

I'm intrigued by these antics.

Actually I'm intrigued by all of it. 

Still. 

We don't know if our babies will age or grow … and if they don't what'll happen to them by the time all of SG-1 are old or gone. But right now the little things are still amazing enough to make us all live in the present rather than to worry about the future. Yet. 

 

Daniel arrives a bit later with bags full of bagels and his coffee pot. He puts everything on my counter and greets the dolls with hair ruffles. Naturally he's been the first one to get over the shock of having to deal with walking, talking doll-copies of ourselves. While everyone else was still trying to get their heads around this – even for us – miracle, Daniel already chatted with them and did his cultural thing. 

I wonder why they didn't demand to live with him. 

But while the squirts love Daniel, it was me they chose to live with. Lucky ole me. 

I move Danny and his magazine to the little doll chairs and table I've put up in a corner of the kitchen. But the magazine is too big for the table, so he ends up on the floor. “Big Dak,” he says just when I put plates and flatware on the table. “Can Aye haz a pen. pleez?”

“What'cha want a pen for?” I ask.

“This be vewy wong. Dey say de Babeecloneians... “

“The Babyclones, what?” 

“The Babylonians,” Daniel helps out.

“The Babeecloneians have pweewomits. They don't. They have sigguwats,” Danny tells me indignantly. “Aye'ss need to cowwect dat.”

“Siggu... what?” 

“Ziggurats,” Daniel says and puts butter, jam, cream cheese, and honey on the table. “Remember the one we found?”

I remember something about a ziggurat and a slimy Goa'ulded creature. “Yeah. No details please, thank you.” I find a black marker and then think better of it. I give Danny a pencil. It's easier to remove if he scribbles all over himself instead the magazine. 

Daniel and I have breakfast. The bagels he brought are good and his coffee pot fits with my machine so we have enough coffee to wake us both. The squirts don't eat. They insist on going shopping with me though. Have you ever been at a grocery store with two toddlers? Then you know how much fun it is. 

Except my toddlers are plush dolls and the hardest part of taking them shopping is to make them appear lifeless. Believe me, that never works out. Those two can't sit still or keep their yaps shut if their lives depended on it. Unless they're watching TV, then they can be as quiet as mice.

But going shopping is another story, and one I won't have to worry about today.

“Big Dak, Aye if booooowwweeeed.”

“Baby Dak, I knooooooooooow.” I say in a sing song voice, matching his own whine.

The comic strips fall to the floor and the bug is sending me a little pout around his thumb. Is it important for baby dolls to learn how to live without sucking their thumbs? I doubt it. One of the advantages about living with dolls, I guess. 

“Can Big Danwell wead uf a stowy?” Dak asks hopefully.

“I can,” Daniel offers. “Or I can tell you one.”

Baby Danny immediately dismisses his Geographic magazine and climbs up his big version's leg until he sits comfortably in his lap. Not wanting Baby Jack to feel left out I take my chair and put it in front of the heater. Dak puts his head on my shoulder and wriggles around until he's on his side. Usually it's Dak sitting on Big Daniel's lap and Danny on mine. For some reason that's how they like it best, but they don't mind if they have to swap for some reason. 

“Tell uf how yoo founded uf,” Dak demands politely. When I gently tap his thumb with my finger, he pulls it out for a moment and adds. “Pwease.”

“You know that story. You've been there,” I say. “Daniel can tell us about Egypt. Or Abydos. How's that?”

“It's okay,” Daniel says with that indulgent smile he never has for me, but always for the dolls.

He grabs his kitchen chair and moves it next to mine so we're all huddled up together at my kitchen window. It occurs to me I could have lit a fire in the fire place over in the living room. It would have been more comfy and Dak could have just sat in front of it to dry. But my brain doesn't work like that this early in the morning. And who knows? The squirt might get his pants on fire if he moves too close to it. So better stay here in reach of the coffee and the leftover bagels. 

“It was on a dark and stormy night...,” I begin, but am immediately interrupted by Danny-doll.

“This iss the wong stowy, Big Dak!”

“Let Danwell tell it,” Baby Dak orders around his thumb. 

“All right,” I know when I'm defeated, so I sit back and give Daniel a prompting look.

He clears his throat and begins. “It was a bright and sunny day on P3X... “

“Wonderland,” I correct him. “And you don't know what the weather was like. We never left that factory.”

“... on the planet Jack christened Wonderland the moment we stepped through the gate into the warehouse and saw the huge sugar cane shaped pillars to either side of it.”

“Don't forget the train-set and the castle made of colorful wood bricks.”

“Right. Jack was so happy, he almost forgot to wave his P90 in all directions to make sure no giant bad smelly aliens were attacking us. Everywhere we went there were toys. Train sets, brick houses and castles, teddy bears, dolls, dollhouses, beautiful doll clothes. On every shelf and in every corner, on every work bench we could see everything a kid wants underneath the Christmas tree,” Daniel says.

“Do wee gets a chwistmastwee too, Dak?” Danny asks.

Daniel and I share a smile. That's what we were going to do today, only the squirts don't know it yet. 

“Do wee get pwefentf, too?” Dak wants to know.

“Yep,” I confirm. “If you're good. Only good kids get presents, ya know?” Doesn't hurt to emphasize that point a little. Daniel glares at me and I shrug. “What?”

“Dat's goody den. I'm alway' goodeft,” Dak says contently. 

“Ah, let's go on with this story, okay?” Daniel says with a chuckle at my snort. It's true though. They are good kids. They only get into mishap because they are, well, kids. Dolls. Whatever. They're little and they think little and therefore not everything they plan is thought through very well. Doesn't mean they're brats. 

Daniel goes on, “Jack was immediately gone for one of the train sets. He tried to hide it, but the way he was grinning gave it away. Jack doesn't usually grin on missions. Not much anyway. Not like the cat who found the cream anyway.”

“I was SO not grinning like a cat,” I whine.

“Yes, you were.”

“Was not.”

“Were too.”

“Daniel.”

“Jack?”

“What?” I grin. He rolls his eyes. He knows I'm doing this on purpose just to annoy him. It's so much fun and it’s never lost its appeal through the years. 

“Aye likef twainf,” Dak offers his support.

“Aye toe!” Danny pipes up from Daniel's lap. 

Daniel laughs which makes his blue eyes sparkle in a way I really like. We share another smile over the dolls’ heads and he nods. “The train was nice. So were the bricks and the many other toys we found. Now the only sad thing was that everything appeared to be dusty and not taken care of very well. Because the place we visited was very old.”

“Anschiend,” Danny nods.

“Yes, ancient. Nobody had been there in a verrrry long time. Not to play and not to dust off all the toys.” 

“Awwww,” Danny sighs.

“We looked around to find some writings or any other indication about what this place used to be, besides a warehouse full of toys. It looked like Santa Clause's Northpole workshop. Only it was dark and there were no elves or angels. And no cookies or candles. Nor reindeer. Then Teal'c found another door and as we stepped through we were standing in some kind of factory room. There were assembly lines, consoles with buttons, sewing machines and other technology. Jack sent Sam to find a power source so we could have some more light.”

Which, in a way, had been my first error of judgment. If we hadn't found the power source to turn the lights up, we'd never have started the machinery back to work. But I was as dumbfounded at our discovery as everyone else, besides Teal'c maybe. Not much can get Teal'c to be dumbfounded. The place wasn't Goa'uld, that was for sure. According to Daniel there were no traces of Goa'uld writing or any indication of Goa'uld technology. It was even more alien than that.

“Sam found the light switch,” I say, remembering how the dark room got flooded in warm yellow light all of a sudden. We stared at the machines in front of us, dusty as the toys in the other room. There was writing on some of the consoles and Daniel found a few scrolls with instructions, written in some Greek related gibberish. 

“The scrolls were lying around everywhere. On counter tops and shelves. I unrolled some of them and found order lists for items to be made and shipped off to other planets. But the most interesting scrolls were those with instructions on how to make the toys.” 

“YAY!” Dak squeaks. “Making toys!”

“What did the scwolls say 'bout making toys?” Danny asked, bouncing a little on Daniel's lap.

“They said there were two different kinds of toys,” Daniel continues, his long fingers absently stroking up and down Danny's arm. “Living toys and mechanical toys. I thought it was an error in my translation and that it meant something different. Lifelike toys for example, which would be why the dolls and bears all looked very realistic, and mechanical toys like the train set.” 

I should have known Daniel wasn't wrong about what he translated. He rarely gets it wrong. But when he stumbled over that part of the scroll's contents and informed us he wasn't sure about it, I assumed it meant 'lifelike' as well. I remember how we were wandering around those halls. Carter and Teal'c studying the machinery, Daniel and I drawn in by the toys....

 

**Comfort and Joy**

**I**

… Daniel held up a baby rag doll; a little girl with blond hair and beady green eyes. She was a bit dusty, but you could still see that her pink dress had once been very pretty, if my opinion on what's pretty on a doll counted for anything. He put her down when he realized I was watching him. Giving a little cough he stuffed his hands into his BDU pockets and blinked. “Strange, huh?”

“What? You cuddling a doll?”

“No. That's no more strange than you wanting to play with the train set,” he countered easily.

“It's a cool train set,” I replied, getting defensive.

“One of my foster siblings used to have a doll like this,” he replied softly. “She used to carry it around all the time. Everywhere she went, that doll went along. It was the only thing left. The only thing connecting her to her old life, when she was still with her parents.”

“Crap,” I muttered. I didn't expect this. Daniel didn't usually talk about his childhood. “What happened to them?”

“I don't know. She never said.” He shrugged and picked up the doll again, tenderly caressing her face with his fingertips. “I don't know what became of her. When I left that home she was still there, with her doll. I think it had a name, but I don't remember it. What I remember is how I envied her for having that doll.” 

“Why? You wanted one, too?” I knew it was a dumb thing to say. Knowing Daniel it couldn't be that simple. But I never seemed to find the right words around him. Well, I never seemed to find the right words in general. But sometimes around Daniel it was... more complicated. I wanted to say one thing and said another. I wanted to comfort him and walked away. I wanted to... 

“No. But I wanted something to connect to my parents. When they took me away from the museum, after … the accident... I never got the chance to take something with me. I had the clothes we took with us to New York, that's all. The social worker who took my things from the hotel room didn't think of bringing some of my books or the teddy bear.” 

“Bastards,” I blurted out. How on Earth could a social worker not think of bringing a newly orphaned kid his toys and anything that might help comforting him? 

He smiled at me, kind of gratefully, and my heart gave a sudden thud before I turned away from that smile and tried to focus on my surroundings. I spotted that train set again and walked over to take a closer look at it. Again. 

It was beyond cool. Three trains, futuristic shaped wagons and a locomotive that seemed to be made from glass. I touched one of them. It felt smooth and cool under my hand. The tracks were going in curves and through tunnels and over snow covered mountains and down again into a valley with tiny houses and trees. Tiny people stood by at the station, forever frozen in their positions, forever waiting for the train to pick them up. Some waved their hand in farewell, others stood in groups. There were no wires, no cables to indicate if this train was electric. But I knew it would be.

“What's your story?” Daniel was suddenly next to me, pointing his chin at the train.

“Huh?” I pushed one of the locomotives with my forefinger, but it didn't move an inch.

“The moment you laid eyes on this train you were mesmerized by it.”

Damn him to hell for always noticing such things. I shrugged. “Always wanted one for Christmas.” My story wasn't as painful as his. My childhood had been mostly happy and the fact I never got that train when I was a kid didn't traumatize me. 

“Why'd you never get one?” 

“I guess I wasn't good enough to deserve one,” I joked.

“Come on, Jack. I'm sure you were a … a...“ He raised his eyebrows and his eyes widened in that comical way that always made me want to laugh. “... charming... bratty handful. Child. I meant child.”

I snorted. “Yeah.”

“Seriously...” He followed me around the large table the train set was built on. 

“One year I wanted to get even with my little brother about something and told him Santa wasn't real,” I said just to get him off my case. I hadn't talked about that in years, hadn't thought about it in years. It was one of those stupid things you did as a kid and when you realize you were a jerk you make up with your brother and things move on. “He cried and went to ask mom and dad. “ I grimaced. 

“Wow, that was mean of you. What happened?” Daniel examined one of the trains and tried to open the tiny doors with no success.

“My dad took me to my room and sat me down for a serious discussion about not taking away a little kid's dream and he ordered me to think about a way to make it up to Jeffery. I argued that Jeffery would figure out about Santa not being real anyway and dad said that was true, but as long as he could believe in Santa he should. And how would I feel if someone had burst my bubble like that?” 

“Your dad was a smart man,” Daniel said. 

“Yeah.” I brushed a finger over the miniature mountain tops. Suddenly I missed my folks more than ever in the last ten years since they were gone. 

“You gave your train set to your brother,” Daniel concluded. 

“It was the one thing I wanted that year. I couldn't stop talking about it for months before Christmas. It was one of those very expensive sets with electricity and a real steam engine. I gave it to Jeff and maybe it made up a bit for destroying his belief in Santa. I don't know. He loved it. And my dad was proud because he knew what a sacrifice it was for me.” I smiled briefly. “When Charlie was born I vowed to myself to get one for him. Sara used to say I was the biggest kid of the family. He was barely old enough to really play with it when I bought a huge train set. We set it up in the attic and spent hours laying tracks and building houses and mountains. It might still be there.” Realizing I’d started to go in directions I didn't want to go, I spun around and strode across the hall, away from the train. 

Slapping my radio I asked Carter what they were doing.

“I think there was a short circuit in one of the machines, sir. It's easy to fix though.”

“The question is; do we want to fix it? And why?” I said, suddenly aware of all the beady eyes staring at me. Dolls, teddy bears, Barbie sized figures... “Whoa!” I suddenly spotted something very odd on one of the shelves. “Daniel? Will you come over here for a minute?”

“Jack?” He was by my side in an instant. “Oh, holy buckets.”

“You can say that again.”

We were gazing at an army of toy soldiers. Only that these weren't your ordinary little tin figures. 

“A Jaffa army,” Daniel said in awe. “Look at how lifelike they are. How detailed their uniforms are crafted?” 

“I thought you said this place wasn't Goa'uld?” I snapped, hand on my trigger.

“It isn't. But that doesn't mean they didn't know the Goa'uld or Jaffa,” Daniel said patiently. “Relax, Jack. These are just toys.”

“Very realistic toys,” I muttered. “Some of them appear to be bleeding.” I pointed at two of the Jaffa who had wounds in their torsos and on their faces.

“Yeah,” Daniel picked them up and winced. “Look at their faces,” he murmured. “They look agonized. As if they're in pain.”

A sudden loud bang made us both jump and Daniel hastily put the figures back onto their shelf. I flicked my radio again. “Carter? Teal'c? Report!”

But my voice was swallowed by sudden loud music coming from a carousel in a corner. Its wooden horses and dragon-like creatures started moving as flashing, colorful lights appeared on the roof of that thing. 

“Jack!” Daniel grabbed my arm.

When I spun on my heel I saw the trains moving on their tracks. Lights flickered in the windows of the tiny houses and at the stations.

Carter and Teal'c came running through the doors to the factory. “I'm sorry, sir,” she said a little breathless. “I guess I accidentally fixed the machines.”

“Turn it off,” I yelled, trying to make myself heard over the carousel music. 

“I tried! I can't turn it off again.”

Teal'c, grim faced, offered to shoot it all to hell and I gave him the thumb's up. But Daniel shook his head and argued that blowing up this place would serve nobody. “And besides, it's just a giant toy factory. There's no danger here,” he finished, giving me one of his 'I know I'm right and you know it too' glares.

“It's not very useful either,” I countered and Teal'c nodded his head in agreement.

“But the technology is amazing,” Carter exclaimed.”I want to figure out how it works, sir. It could be used for other purposes at home. If we can re-engineer it.”

“Someone turn off the music at least!” I hollered.

“Very well!” Teal'c turned around, whipped up his staff weapon and fired at the carousel, stopping the music short. There was a lot of smoke coming out of the carousel and the wooden animals seemed to look accusingly at us.

“Thank you!” I said with feeling.

“You are welcome, O'Neill,” Teal'c replied stoically.

Daniel rolled his eyes and wandered off into the factory hall. Carter and Teal'c followed him while I sauntered back to that train set and watched the running trains for a moment. I knew I shouldn't. I should have followed my team and figure out what Carter did and how to take whatever she needed home with us. But Daniel was right, this was just a toy factory. A moment of admiration for what really was one of the coolest train sets couldn't hurt, right?

Right!

My radio crackled and I absently slapped the button. “Carter?”

“We found the power source, sir. It's in the wall behind the machines.”

“I'm on my way.” I gave the train set one last look and wondered why it was here and not in a kid's room to be played with. 

I headed into the factory room where Carter and Teal'c had climbed behind the assembly lines to dismantle parts of the wall. It was made of huge metal tiles and Carter attacked them with one of her tools. Daniel stood by one of the machines, studying a scroll in his hand. 

“I can't make any sense of this,” he muttered, absently tapping the device with one hand while he held the scroll with the other. The device reminded me of a jukebox we used to have at our local coffee shop when I was a kid. “Those who are in need of comfort and joy be still and see the glory, feel the warmth heal your soul. Take home what's made for you, never let go of it again, find what's in your heart.”

I raised my cynical left eyebrow. “Sounds cryptic.”

“Sounds like a mixture of Christmas Carols and the Wizard of Oz, or something like that,” Daniel said, frowning at the scroll.

“Can't see the connection to the wizard.” I shrugged.

“Well, I don't know... it's not so much the words. But it sounds pretty much like 'click your heels three times'... or 'Somewhere over the Rainbow'.” 

“This is a place made for kids, apparently. What do you expect?” 

“Jack, maybe this is Santa Clause's workshop,” Daniel said slowly, looking up from his scroll with wide brilliant blue eyes. Like a kid who has just discovered Christmas. ”Just... imagine for a moment... “

“What? You telling me Santa was an alien?” 

“We’ve seen stranger things.” He licked his lips and spun around, taking in the room with a gesture of his hands. “This has all the right connections. The toys, the work counters, the machines. The elves may be gone and I guess Santa moved out some time ago, but... “ He trailed off as he looked at me, then shrugged.

“Santa was invented by Coca Cola,” I objected.

“Ah, well, it might not be our Santa. Who knows? Maybe he once went to other worlds where people celebrated something similar to our Christmas. Maybe it wasn't a “Santa”. Maybe it was a race of... err... ”

“Elves,” I said helpfully.

Daniel rolled his eyes, clearly annoyed now. “Fine. Just forget I said anything.”

“Hey, why can't they be elves?” Now I was annoyed, because I’d even considered playing along with his crazy theories. “If they can be a race of alien Santas, they can resemble elves, right?”

He put the scroll down on the jukebox machine and looked at me, wary. “I know how that sounds. You don't need to... .”

“Hey! I'm not... .”

“It's okay, Jack.” He rubbed the bridge of his nose and turned away from me. “I guess I was carried away for a moment. It's a toy factory. Closed down for whatever reason.” His voice was tired now, not annoyed, just tired and I wasn't sure how, but I knew I screwed up. Again. 

“I was just trying to help,” I snapped. I was. But whenever I opened my mouth the wrong thing came out. Frustrated, I gave the jukebox thing a kick. It was the closest thing to kick and otherwise I might have kicked Daniel. Or kissed him. I always seemed to want to do one or the other. Crap. 

The jukebox began to splutter with humming and clattering. I jumped away from it, jerked up my P90 and aimed it at the colorful blinking lights emerging from it.

A beam shot out of the machine in rainbow colors. Daniel was right. Somewhere over the rainbow fit the subtext here. 

“JACK!” Daniel was at my side, his hands grabbing my jacket to pull me away, but the beam engulfed both of us, rooting us to the spot.

I didn't know how long it lasted, but I remember hearing bells while we were caught in that beam, paralyzed. Bells and a music that had nothing to do with the blaring carousel music from before. It was something different. Almost celestial... and coming from a guy like me, that means something. Not that I ever mentioned this in my report later. I told Daniel in a weak moment and said I'd kill him if he ever breathed a word about it to anyone else. But he only smiled and said he had heard it, too. D'oh.

When the beam released us and the lights died, my reflexes took over and I sent a shower of bullets through the jukebox thingy. Carter and Teal'c had come to our rescue and were now alternately staring at me and the smoking machine. 

“Sir? Daniel? Are you all right?” 

“Fine,” Daniel and I said simultaneously. 

They continued to stare at us a moment longer. When we didn't shrink, no new heads grew on our shoulders and we didn't drop dead, Carter cleared her throat. “What happened?”

“I don't know,” Daniel said. “It just started humming and blinking and... “ He waved at the device. 

“I kinda... kicked it,” I muttered before I could hold back. 

“You did WHAT?” Daniel stared at me. 

“Well, it was an accident... kinda.” 

“How can you accidentally kick something, O'Neill?” Teal'c asked.

I adjusted the cap on my head and tried not to look embarrassed. “Daniel here was his usual annoying self and... “

“I was annoying? “I”? What the hell did “I” do?” 

Oh, for crying out... I didn't say that out loud, did I? I did. “I was discussing your theory and you stomped off sulking!”

“Sulking? I... ah... I don't believe this!” He flailed his arms to underline his words and I waited for a re-run of the plantboy dance. “You weren't discussing anything, Jack. You were just being obnoxious as usual. I don't know why I'm even trying to have a decent conversation with you!” He turned on his heels and marched away from us, back into the toy room. 

“Sir...” Carter began, a cold edge to her voice.

“Yeah, yeah, I get it,” I snarled and refrained from kicking the jukebox thing again. 

I closed up to him by the doll section and my hand came down on his arm, much more gentle than I intended to. “Daniel?”

He stiffened but didn't move away, which was a good thing. “This place,” he said. “It's kind of... weird.”

“Yeah.” I felt it too. It seemed to intensify feelings. Moods. Whatever. I hadn't thought in years about the train set and my little brother's crestfallen face when I'd ripped the Santa dream away from him. And my irritation towards Daniel seemed to flare up for no real reason. As was the overwhelming wish to find a mistletoe and do the most old fashioned stuff... haul him out of here and take him to my cabin for Christmas, just him and me and the fireplace. 

“Makes me remember things I thought I'd forgotten. And reminds me of all the Christmases I spent with people who didn't really...” His head dropped to his chest as he shook off my hand to wrap his arms around himself. 

“...care,” I finished his sentence. Something was wrong with my voice. It sounded like sandpaper. My hand traveled up his arm and gripped his tense shoulder. “We care. I care. You know that.” I didn't know where those words came from, but they fell right out of my mouth and hovered between us. 

“Yeah, Jack, I know.” He looked up and gave me a little resigned smile. “Sometimes you have a very … unique way of showing it. But I guess that's just... you.” 

I caught myself shuffling my feet and shifting uncomfortably at the long hard look he gave me, like he could see right through all my smoke and mirrors. “Look, I'm sorry,” I grounded out. “You weren't... you know... .”

“Annoying.”

“Yeah. I mean, no. You weren't.”

“You were, though,” he said easily. 

“I always am. It's the O'Neill charm.” I shrugged.

“Which is never lost on me,” he said and his eyes softened.

I was about to give him a witty remark when a loud penetrating sound made us both sprint back into the factory room. The assembly line was moving and a klaxon howled. Carter looked dumbfounded and shook her head the moment I opened my mouth. “It wasn't me sir. It started on its own.”

“Perhaps you started a process when you accidentally kicked the device,” Teal'c offered stoically.

We watched transfixed as one of the metallic wall tiles slid open. Teal'c, Carter and I raised our guns and waited for whatever would come down the assembly lanes. 

“Ah, guys?” We turned as one to Daniel, who stood next to me and pointed at a figure hovering next to the jukebox thingy. 

“Greetings,” the figure said. Now, he didn't look like an elf, or Santa. He was covered in white flowing robes, but his face was young, almost childlike. Long hair spilled around his shoulders like molted gold. “I am called the Deliverer of Gifts.”

“Hey there,” I waved my gun vaguely in his direction. Not threatening. Just... letting him know we were not defenseless. Though by the looks of it that guy wasn't real. More like a...

“He's a holograph, sir,” Carter informed me.

“Right.” I stepped forwards and waved the P90 through him.

His smile didn't waver as he bowed. “Welcome to our world. You have chosen to pick a comfort and joy gift.”

“We did?” 

Daniel elbowed me aside non-too-gently and blinked. “Hi, um, I'm Daniel Jackson. This is Colonel O'Neill, Captain Carter and Teal'c.” 

The gift-guy turned to Teal'c and suddenly his eyes grew sad. “You are Jaffa.”

“Indeed.” Teal'c inclined his head slightly.

“We were once attacked by your race. We had to defend ourselves and use the devices which are here to bring comfort and joy to overcome the army.”

“Were you successful?” 

“Yes, but at a very high cost. They do not suffer anymore, but they will remain forever as toys in our workshop.”

Daniel and I exchanged a look. “You turned a whole army of Jaffa into tin soldiers?” I asked. I was impressed. And worried. If they could do it with the bad guys...

“It is most unfortunate we had to do this. They destroyed so much. We had to step in.” Shaking his head, gift-guy turned his attention back to Teal'c. “I can not sense evil in you. What is your name?” 

“Teal'c.”

“Whom do you serve, Teal'c?” 

“I serve no one. I am with the Tau'ri to fight the false gods and free all Jaffa from slavery,” Teal'c said with quiet passion.

The Deliverer of Gifts got closer to Teal'c. “I can sense much strength in you, Teal'c. You chose your path well.” The entity, holograph, or whatever it was moved on to Carter and the smile was back on his face. “A warrior woman,” he stated.

“Yes,” Carter said and eyed the figure in front of her with the curiosity of a scientist. “Can I ask you a couple of questions?”

“I am energy. I am the only one left. Once upon a time we were many, and this house was filled with laughter of children and those who took care of them.”

“So, this is a toy factory?” Daniel asked.

“If that is what you want to call it, then yes. We were selling toys to other planets, to make people happy. But once every year we opened our house to those who needed comfort and joy. Everyone was welcomed to pick up their special gift to heal their hearts and souls.” 

“How... how did that work?” Daniel inquired.

“Differently for everyone,” the Bringer of Gifts said. His voice sounded like bells and I suddenly recognized it as the bells I had heard when the beam had trapped us in place. He reached out a hand to touch Carter's face and she stepped back. 

At the same time I snarled a harsh warning. “Aht! Hands off.”

“Do not worry, nor fear. I will not harm her,” the gift-deliverer assured me. To Carter he said. “I would like to give you a comfort and joy gift as well. But the device is damaged. It only created two more gifts. I see much conflict in you, but also a strong soul, and belief.”

Carter frowned and bit her bottom lip. “Thank you. I guess.” 

“Have faith. All of you. Your journey will be long and thorny, but in the end you will all find what you were seeking.” The energy figure moved away from Carter and when it looked at me and Daniel there was an even deeper smile playing around his lips. “You have chosen to receive a comfort and joy gift. So be it.”

Going through the gate taught me a thing or two about aliens bearing gifts, so I wasn't all that enthusiastic. “Uh, nope. I don't think I ordered a gift. So thanks, but I'll pass.”

“You cannot turn it down nor leave it here.”

“Excuse me,” Daniel raised a finger. “What kind of a gift is it exactly?”

“It is coming down the assembly line this moment.” 

We craned our necks and then Daniel and I almost crashed our skulls together as we bent over the assembly line to stare at the… gifts... moving in front of us at that precise moment. 

The assembly line stopped.

“Jack,” Daniel said.

“Daniel,” I replied automatically because it's what I do.

“You may take them home and care for them. Seek comfort from their presence, seek joy from their spirits.” Gift-bringer guy appeared on the other side of the assembly line and his eyes – which were as golden as his hair by the way – seemed to melt with mine. “There is an old pain in your heart which needs to be healed to make place for a new beginning. You will learn to show love again.”

I blinked. 

He tilted his head towards Daniel. “Your pain is similar to his. But you both are already tied to one another. Learn to laugh again, and to trust. And to take what you will be offered without questioning it.”

“Right. That's cryptic enough,” I said. “Thanks for the...” I pointed at the gifts lying in front of us, “dolls.”

“May I, sir?” Carter picked them up and patted them, turned them over in her hands. “They're rag dolls,” she concluded.

“D'oh,” I muttered.

”You must take them to make them whole,” gift-guy instructed. He raised his hand and the dolls flew out of Carter's grasp and smacked against our chests. Daniel caught his and my honed reflexes made me grab for mine without thinking. 

The first thing I noticed was how soft they were. The little body I was holding seemed to snuggle into my hands like a real baby. Flashes of memories were triggered and I stomped them down. “Thanks,” I muttered again, waving my doll in the Gift-bringer's direction. 

“Yeah,” Daniel said slowly, still petting his doll. “Thank you. Um, they are very nice.”

The energy being flashed us another bright smile, then it was gone. 

“O-kay,” I drawled after a moment of awkward silence. “That was...”

“...different,” Daniel and I ended the sentence together.

“Let's take Comfort and Joy here and go home.” I gave the doll in my hand a weary look. The gray fuzzy hair and brown beady eyes looked awfully familiar. Not to mention the mini BDUs it was wearing. 

“It's amazing,” Carter said as we trudged back through the toy room. “They must have created them after your images, Colonel. That was what the beam did. Create an image of you and Daniel and then transformed it into these dolls.”

“I guess that's what they meant when they said the toys would be... lifelike,” Daniel assumed. His doll was wearing wire framed glasses and its eyes were beady, too, just blue. 

“Wee iss vewy aliwe,” Danny doll said. 

“Wee cweated jus' for yoo,” Jack doll said.

“Whoa!” I dropped my 'gift' and took several steps backwards. I barely refrained from pointing my gun at the doll. After all it wasn't Chucky doll from “Child's Play”.

Daniel raised his doll to his face and gazed at it. “You talk.”

“Aye iss Danwell Daksin, pieceful explowew.”

“Yeah, I thought so. Hi, I'm Daniel. Peaceful explorer too.” 

“Aye know. Aye iss maded for yoo.”

“You are, aren't you?” And there was a smile spreading out on the guy's face the size of Chicago, I swear. I've rarely seen Daniel smile like that. 

I looked down my nose at the very indignant toy to my feet. “Diss be no wewry nice,” I got lectured. “Aye huwt me bum.” In went the thumb and two brown beady eyes blinked up at me. 

“Hey,” I heard myself say as I crouched and carefully scooped mini Jack up into my hands. “How can you hurt your butt? It's just... velours.”

“Wha'f veloorf?”

“It's what you're made off,” I explained, carefully examining the little guy for broken limbs.

“Aye iff noe maded of veloorf. Aye iff maded of love an' comfort,” he garbled around his thumb. 

“These toys seem to be alive. I suggest extreme caution,” Teal'c's voice rumbled from behind me.

“Sir, there has to be some... some... scientific explanation for this,” Carter said, eyes wide as saucers. “We should take them home and, uh, do some tests.”

For some reason I was opposed to the idea. “You mean prodding and poking them? They're dolls, for crying out loud.”

“Talking dolls,” Teal'c pointed out.

“Aye iff no danjewoof,” my doll said and wriggled out of my grip until it was on the ground again. “Aye iff maded to life wif yoo.” He pointed at me with the hand that wasn't stuck to his mouth.

“Aye iss too!” I turned my head and saw Daniel's doll clambering down his body. He joined the other doll and they both stood in front of me. 

“Hey, I thought you were mine,” Daniel joined me in my uncomfortable position on the floor. We still weren't eye to eye with those tots, but it was the best we could do.

Danny clasped his pudgy plushy hand around Jack doll's and two pair of beady eyes gazed up at us. “Wee be mean' toe bee togethew alwais,” the said in as one. Then they moved forward as one and clamped their arms around my ankles, causing me to almost fall flat on my ass. “Wee goin' home with yoo!”

“Whoa, hold it! That's not my decision,” I heard myself say. “And Daniel doesn't live with me. So if you...” I tried to pry Danny doll away from my ankle without much success. “...are Daniel's doll, you should really go with him.” The short stuffed arms were like vices. 

“Nuhuhhh, wee noe beein' sep'rated,” it howled.

“So you both go and...” But I didn't even get to finish my sentence when doll number two slapped my leg with surprising force for such a tiny soft creature. 

“Yoo noe beein' stoopid. Danny and aye havta stay togethaw alwais.”

“All right, that's it.” I grabbed each doll at the back of their tiny BDU pants and pulled until they released my ankles and were both dangling down from my hands. I managed to get back to my feet without wincing and with as much grace as a guy with shot knees and bad back can muster. “No throwing tantrums, no slapping the colonel,” I growled. 

“Big Dak, Big Dak,” Danny doll squeaked and it took me a moment to register that's my name. Neither one of them can say “Jack”. 

“What?”

“Aye iss getting' sick!”

“You can't get sick, you're a doll.” But while I might be a hard assed colonel with a bad temper, I'm not heartless. So I jiggled them until they were sitting in the crooks of my arms, facing each other. “Now. How about we get you back to the SGC and figure out, what General Hammond thinks about someone taking you guys home?”

“Yoo,” Danny insisted, a small pout on his face.

“Aht! What did I just say about tantrums?” 

“Wee wewe maded for yoo,” Danny mumbled and lowered his head. Great. A Daniel doll with Daniel attitude. Dak continued to suck his thumb and sulked.

“Okay,” Daniel stepped in. “Look, this is all a little bit... confusing. We'll take you with us and Jack here will stop being an a... a jerk.”

“Carter, dial us home,” I said. There was a headache coming my way, I could feel it. A very nasty, long term headache.

**II**

It sure was an interesting briefing what with the dolls being an active part of it. They toddled all over the briefing room table, plopped down on their butts in front of a very confused and amazed General Hammond and informed him they were 'maded foe Big Dak and Danwell toe be deir comfowts an' Joy alwais'. 

“Diss means Big Dak hass toe take us home with him.” Dak said and gave me a sullen look. “Doe, hee iss noe nice. He dwopped mea!”

General Hammond glared at me as if I had dropped one of his grandchildren. 

“It was an accident,” I heard myself say in a very defensive voice. “I'm not used to talking little critters. Dolls. Toys. Whatever. Sir.”

“I hope Colonel O'Neill didn't hurt you,” Hammond addressed the squirts gently. He brushed his large hands over the plushy heads. 

“Aye huwt my bum,” the little brat said, kind of sniffly.

I opened my mouth to point out - again - that he was a doll, but one glare from Daniel and Carter made me re-think my choice of action. Instead I rolled my eyes and shook my head. 

“These are no ordinary toys. I advised extreme caution,” Teal'c, the voice of reason, said. “However, the being which created these dolls seemed to be of pure nature.”

“What do you mean, Teal'c?” Hammond asked, his hands still petting the dolls.

“It was the way it talked,” Daniel said thoughtfully. “He came across as very sincere. Almost like, ah... “

“Angelic,” Carter jumped in, then blushed and spluttered. “Ah, theoretically speaking, sir. He resembled the image of an angel. Golden hair, white robes, sparkling eyes, lovely voice...”

“No wings though,” I jumped in.

“No, no wings,” Daniel agreed. “But he did hover. Of course we're aware it was not an angel. It was an alien being. Whether it was holographic or an energy entity without a physical body we don't know. It wasn't very forthcoming in explanations and it talked rather cryptically.”

Hammond's blue eyes fixated on me. “Would you assess this being as dangerous, Colonel?”

“It called himself the Deliverer of Gifts, sir. That guy was a little flaky and his gifts seem to be a bit... unusual... but, no, I wouldn't assess as it dangerous, unless there are bombs hidden in those dolls.” But I already knew there wouldn't be any danger coming from those toys. As I mentioned before I'm usually not very trusting when it comes to aliens bringing gifts. But something in the guy's eyes when he'd looked at me... Something in his voice maybe... I couldn't point my finger at it, but I knew there was no evil behind those golden eyes. He was no wolf in the fold.

“Dere's noe bombs in us!” Dak doll stomped his little black socked feet as he marched over to me.

“Hey, easy little fella.” I couldn't stop the grin at the sight. Intimidation didn't really work when you were 12 inches high and made of velours.

“What are we going to do with them?” Hammond asked, smothering a grin of his own. 

“Wee be maded to live with Big Dak.” Danny doll exclaimed, pulling at Hammond's little finger to get his attention. 

When the general looked down at him, Danny clasped his hands behind his back and made himself as tall as possible. “An' Big Danwell is s'pposed toe live there toe!”

“Err, excuse me?” Daniel cleared his throat. “I already have an apartment, so you're welcome to live there with me. You're my... gift, right?”

“Buuut, Dak an' aye awe noe s'possed to be sep'rated,” Danny doll lectured, now zeroing in on Daniel. 

I suddenly had an epiphany as big as a pink elephant or a rainbow colored clue bus. “Guys,” I interrupted before this discussion could go certain ways. “Why don't we go to meet Doctor Fraiser? I'm sure she's dying to meet ya fellas. Then we can talk about living arrangements.”

“Good.” Hammond nodded his approval. “Someone show our guests the way to the infirmary please? You're dismissed for now. We'll meet again once Doctor Fraiser has results for us.” He stood and hurried off to his office, probably to daydream of a glass of whiskey. I could use one.

“I'll take them,” Daniel said, and picked up the dolls who settled against his chest. Dak turned away from me, burying his face in Daniel's shirt. Danny doll reached out a hand and patted his companion's gray hair.

I was left in the briefing room feeling like the biggest jerk in the galaxy.

  
  


SG-1 met in the commissary for a private debrief thirty minutes after Daniel had dropped off the squirts in Janet's care. Carter was gobbling down blue Jell-o, Teal'c had his plate full of grapes, apples, bananas and a piece of apple cake. Daniel had coffee. I had nothing. I played with my napkin. 

“I'm really curious what Janet finds out about the dolls,” Carter prattled on. “There must be something. Maybe there's a chip inside them or a disc. Something that makes them talk. A program.”

“Did not the Deliverer of Gifts say they were made of comfort and joy. To heal O'Neill and DanielJackson's hearts. Perhaps there is a spirit in those dolls.” Teal'c popped a grape into his mouth.

“I'm a scientist,” Carter muttered. “Spirits and comfort and love are wonderful things, but there has to be another explanation.”

“I don't know,” Daniel said slowly. “Maybe that beam coming from the device took something from me and Jack and... um... put it into the dolls. I think I'm beginning to understand now what the scrolls meant when they described some of the toys as being lifelike. They meant being alive. And apparently they are made for their owners only.”

“You mean like an imprint? An echo of who you are? A copy of your... personalities?” Carter stopped eating and looked at Daniel and me thoughtfully. “But how?” 

“I don't know. It's an alien device. Who knows what it's capable of?” Daniel said with a shrug.

“Do you feel any different than before?” Carter asked, suddenly alerted.

“What? No. On that planet there...” Daniel gave me a sideways glance and I continued to pick on my napkin. “...I felt oddly vulnerable, and irritated, at the same time... when the Deliverer of Gifts looked at me, I was oddly at peace. With everything.” 

“As was I,” Teal'c confirmed.

Carter sighed. “Okay, fine. Yes. Me too. Did you see his eyes? They were like Christmas tree lights.” 

“Very warm and golden.” Daniel nodded. “Hypnotic too. But not in a bad way.”

“I felt … good when we went home,” Carter said after a moment of silence.

“As did I,” Teal'c offered. “I am still feeling... peaceful.”

When their eyes turned on me, I dropped the napkin I had been fiddling with - those napkins had three layers of thin paper – and stood, stretching my back. “I'm gonna hit the gym for a while.” 

“Sir?” Carter was halfway out of her chair, but Daniel put a hand on her arm and shook his head. 

Waggling my fingers in a flippant wave at my kids, I headed out...

...and went straight to the infirmary.

I found the squirts sitting on a bed with a nurse keeping an eye on them to make sure they wouldn't fall down or run off. “How they doing?” I asked casually.

“They are just the cutest little things, sir,” the nurse beamed at me with motherly warmth in her eyes and voice. “Doctor Fraiser will be right back.”

“Thanks. I'll watch them until she's back,” I said and the woman looked clearly disappointed as she nodded and left. 

Dak doll immediately turned his back on me. Oy, we did have a rocky start here. Danny doll, however, snuggled against my arm when I settled on the bed beside them. “Big Dak, awe yoo goin' to take us home?”

“That's a little complicated,” I tried to explain. “You know, Doctor Fraiser has to make sure you're not...” I searched for words, but the squirt nodded his head.

“Danjewouz. Wee be noe danjewouz. Wee told the doctow.”

“Yeah? What'd she say?” 

“Shee can't find anything wong with us,” Danny said proudly.

“Shee be liking us,” Dak muttered from the far end of the bed where he had crawled to.

“Danwell has to c'me an' live with us, too,” Danny doll insisted.

There it was again. I carefully brushed a hand over his brown haired head. It's a round head, like a soft little ball. “Why?” I asked quietly. “Why is it so important he comes to live with us...me...?”

“'cuz yoo wan' him toe,” Danny said.

Crap, crap, crap. “How'd you figure that?” 

“'cuz hee wan' it toe,” Dak informed me sullenly. 

“Yoo can mawwee,” Danny said enthusiastically. “An' be happee alwaeas!”

“All right, that's not something we should talk about here,” I bleated, suddenly slightly panicked. “There are rules here on Earth... about...” I coughed. “Guys living together and... err... marrying.” Holy shit, there better be nobody around to overhear this conversation.

Danny blinked up at me. “Iss it noe allowed?”

“Not everywhere and not...” I lower my voice. “Not in the military. That's where Daniel and I work. It's... not allowed, no.”

“No mawweein'?” Danny asked sadly.

“No marrying guys for me,” I whispered back. “Sorry.”

“That's whai yoo awe so angwee,” Danny concluded. “Acause yoo can't mawwee Danwell. Ayes iss vewee sowwee.”

Whoa! I scrubbed a hand through my – probably graying even more by the minute – hair. “That's okay, we never talked about, err, marrying.” And we never would, even if the impossible thing happened and we made it together. Even if marrying a guy weren't against the law in my world – I'd been married once and I wouldn't do it again. Not even in Vegas.

The drapes around our bed were pulled away and Fraiser gave us a smile. I recognized the same soft motherly glow in her eyes I had seen on the nurse, and on General Hammond. Though that was probably more grandfatherly. 

“Colonel,” she said upbeat. “May I have Daniel... I mean, Danny doll for one last examination?”

“You're not going to hurt him, are you?” I asked. I knew that woman and her needles.

“No, I just want to take another look at his eyes.”

“Dak has toe come toe,” Danny said, snuggling closer to me.

“It won't take long, sweetie. Dak can wait here with the Colonel. How does that sound?”

“Aye iff noe leaving Dannea alone.” Dak clambered to his feet and spun around to stand by his little sidekick.

Fraiser sighed. “I'd really like you to stay here with Colonel O'Neill. There is no nurse free at the moment to keep an eye on you why I'm occupied with Danny doll.” 

“Noooeee!” both dolls wailed and clasped their hands together. 

Fraiser gave me a desperate look and I carefully put my hands around the soft little bodies and turned them around so they faced me. “Guys, hey guys,” I said, raising my voice just enough to be heard over their complaints. 

They blinked and hiccupped and sniffled.

Oh, for the love of... “Look,” I began. “The Doc here just wants to take a quick look at Danny's eyes. It won't take long...”

“Wee iff noe bein' fep'rated.” Dak said firmly.

I looked over at the Doc. “How about I come along?”

“Wha'th dat?” Dak suddenly asked, pointing at the bulge in my shirt pocket.

“This?” I petted the pocket and remembered I took my yo-yo from my office earlier. “That's my yo-yo.”

“Wha'th a yoooyoo?” Dak asked around his thumb.

“It's a toy. Wanna see how it works?” I fingered it out of my pocket and showed it to him. “It's great when you're bored or nervous. You can play with it and time goes by much faster.”

“Can Aye play with it?” he asked.

“How 'bout a deal. Danny here goes with the doc and I'll show you how it works. And when Danny is back we'll all go and find Big Daniel and talk about going home.”

“Togetha?” both squirts asked hopefully.

I exchanged another look with the Fraiser and she nodded. Apparently the dolls weren't a security risk. “Together,” I confirmed. I knew I was doomed there and then when those two attached themselves to me like little magnets and squeezed my arms. 

“Wee be goin' home with Big Dak,” Danny announced as if Fraiser didn't hear me.

“That's great, sweetie. Are you ready for the eye test now?” She offered him her arms and he crawled over and into them reluctantly. Turning towards Dak he waved. “Aye will beein' back soon!”

“Very soon,” Janet agrees. “You can trust us.”

We watched them leave and Dak didn't look too happy. I scooped him up into my lap and showed him the yo-yo again. “So, you want to know how this works, buddy?” 

“Maibe,” he mumbled.

“Watch out.” I stretched out my right arm, holding the munchkin with the left, and let the yo-yo bounce a couple of time, then rolled it up again and let it bounce again. Then I let it sleep and after a moment I zipped it up into my open palm. 

Distracted for the moment, Dak stared at the yo-yo and then at me. “Dat's kinda cool,” he admitted. Then he turned back to glare at the room. “Whewe iff Dannea?”

“He'll be back soon,” I said. “Why don't we have a little chat in the meantime, from one Jack to another.” 

“Dunnoe,” he said.

“I know you want to protect Danny and you don't want him out of sight. I know that feeling, believe me. But you have to understand that we're one big family here. You can trust these people.” I thought about my next words a moment, then asked. “Do you trust me?”

“Yoo dwopped mee.”

“I know and I'm sorry I dropped you. And that you hurt your... bottom. I didn't mean to, you started talking all of a sudden and I just...”

“Did I scawe yoo?”

“Well, not... scare, but...” He frowned and I sighed. “A little bit, maybe.”

“Sowee.”

“It's okay, it wasn't your fault.”

“Big Dak? Aye iff feelin' vewy funny,” Dak mumbled.

“What? What's wrong?” I picked him up and suddenly he went limp in my arms and his little head lolled to one side. Feeling the panic bubbling up I gave the doll a little shake. “Jack?! Hey, Jack?” I tried to shove a finger under his jacket to feel for a heartbeat, but of course there was none. I surged from the bed, doll plastered to my chest. “Doc! DOC!” I didn't care if all the nurses saw the big bad Colonel O'Neill going mental over a passed out doll. 

Jack-doll moved in my arms and mumbled something. What was that? “Quwiet pleez.”

I dropped back on the bed. “Buddy? Hey, buddy, you okay?” 

“Fleepy,” the doll whispered just in the moment when Fraiser came running in, clicking heels and all.

She carried Danny and looked startled. “Colonel? What happened?”

“Nothing,” I said weakly. “He's fallen asleep.” And I laid back on the bed with my doll-counterpart cuddled up to my chest. His eyes stayed open and his thumb was in his mouth. But he didn't move anymore.

“They sleep?” Fraiser asked.

“Aye iss sleepy toe,” Danny said and wriggled so she let him go. She sat him on the bed and Danny climbed my chest and snuggled in next to Dak. 

“It was a long day after all,” I whispered.

“You can stay here for a while if you want to. Is there anything you need?”

“Nope, we're good. What'd you find out?”

She gave me a nervous little laugh. “Nothing. They're dolls. There's no battery, no chip, no disc, no nothing. They're made of a material close to velours, but not quite. Their innards are some soft material I can't find a name for. They talk, they move... but they're definitely dolls. And they don't seem to have any classified memories. They do know basics. What you and Daniel like... “

“What we like?” I asked mildly puzzled.

“Yes. Food, drinks, hobbies. They know about hockey and Egypt and Artifacts and TV. Domestic stuff. And they seem to be very attached to one another. I don't think they should be separated for any length of time if it's not necessary.” She tousled Dak's gray fuzzy hair. “I wanted to have a closer look at Danny's eyes because of his glasses. But he doesn't need them. His eyes are beads. Normally he shouldn't even be able to see anything.” 

“Normally they shouldn't be talking and walking at all,” I murmured

“Right. Well, there is no medical reason to keep them here. I'd say you can take them home. Keeping them a secret might be another issue.” 

A nurse approached the doc and said something to her. Fraiser nodded and patted Danny's head. “I have to go. When they come around you're free to leave, sir.”

I must've fallen asleep, too, because the next thing I knew was somebody gently shaking my shoulder.

“Jack?”

“Daniel?” I blinked up at him.

“I know you'll hate me for this, but you look incredibly cute with those two in your arms. Has a domestic. peaceful quality.” He grinned down at me, that bastard, and said. “Too bad I don't have my camera.”

“Daniel,” I deadpanned. “Wanna marry me?”

It had the wished for effect. He spluttered and his eyes grew big behind his glasses. “Wha... what?!”

“Move in with me, make babies... oh wait, we already do have babies.” I wriggled around until I had both arms securely around the dolls and sat up. 

“What's wrong with them? Why aren't they moving or talking?” Daniel asked instead of an answer. He looked worried.

“They're just asleep. Apparently they can't close their eyes, so...” I shrugged.

“Ah, okay. General Hammond wants to see us.”

I handed Danny to him and together we trudged through the hallways of SGC like two proud daddies carrying their babies. How weird was that? But I had a feeling that was something we'd better get used to ASAP.. 

Hammond cleared us to go home after giving us some basic rules on how to handle the squirts in public. And after a short meeting with the rest of SG-1 to update them on the new situation Daniel and I headed home.

 

Of course the dolls were wide awake by the time we reached my house, and eager to explore. Have you ever tried to keep toddlers in line? And do you think that's hard? Tough! Try to keep two overactive dolls in line. Then you'll know what hard is. 

Those minis like to play. And to rough house. And to ask zillions of questions. And all at the same time if possible. And they can climb faster than little monkeys. I got an inkling of how Dave must have felt when the chipmunks moved in with him. Only Dave and the chipmunks was a comic. 

This was real.

Daniel and I had our hands full that first evening by plucking the dolls from the TV, the mantle of the fireplace, the kitchen table and various other dangerous spots they managed to get into while exploring. Sure, they're dolls. But that doesn't mean they don't get “hurt” if they fall. 

Dak raided my kitchen cupboards and ended up being powdered in flour while Danny stuck his head into the pot with soup I put on the stove for dinner and lost his glasses in it. We managed to rescue doll and glasses without causing any damage. 

“This is... fun,” Daniel snorted as he cleaned tomato soup from Danny's glasses .

“Ya think?” I was holding Dak over the kitchen sink and dusted flour off his pants. When I swatted his backside none too gently, I had to pay for it with several sneezes as the little flour cloud tickled my nose.

Dak giggled.

Danny put on his clean glasses and looked around. “Dak, iss yoo house always this dusty?”

“No, Danny, that's just the flour Dak poured out everywhere,” I said through gritted teeth.

“Ohhhh.” Danny slid down from Daniel's lap and waddled out the door, leaving tiny flour prints in his wake.

“Get him back!” I snapped. “He'll leave flour everywhere he goes!”

Meanwhile Dak was more or less flour free and I felt the need for a cold beer. “We have to make rules,” I decided once Daniel and Danny were back.

“Wee noe like wules,” Dak pointed out.

“Well, that's too bad because “I” like rules a whole lot,” I said.

“Dak! Yoo don' even know what wules they awe. Don' be naughty.” Danny climbed Daniel's shoulder and settled down there. 

“Thank you, Danny. First rule – and the only one for today...”

“Dere be mowe wules?” Dak asked with a frown.

“Yes, there will be more rules. But it has been a long day and we'll talk about those other rules tomorrow. Now, the first rule in this house is; you don't open any drawers or cupboards without permission. You think you can do that?”

Both round little heads nodded and then they saluted me. 

I bit my lip to keep the laughter inside. I could see Daniel turn away and cough. 

“Good. Now how about we watch some TV together?” Hopefully that would keep them quiet for a while.

“YAY!” Dak jumped from my leg where he had been sitting and Danny followed suit. Off they ran into the living room. 

“Watch the stairs!” Daniel yelled after them.

**III**

We watched The Simpsons. While Dak and I grinned and giggled our way through the first episode, Daniel and Danny didn't seem to be too thrilled. They ended up brooding over the chessboard and Daniel explained to Danny the ground rules of chess. 

Go figure. 

When the Simpsons were over, the squirts asked to be toured through the rest of the house. I reminded them of our first rule and we ventured into the bedroom, ('dat's a biiig bed, Big Dak, can wee sleep dere too?') the spare bed room and my office. 

Danny immediately zeroed in on my desk. “Can Aye open this dwawew?” he asked, and already grabbed the handle with both hands to pull with all his might. Those critters have some strength in their cuddly bodies. The drawer opened and I barely managed to snatch Danny up before he could start pulling out papers. 

“No, you can not open this drawer. The office is off limits to the two of you unless I'm in here. Understood?” 

“That's another wule,” Danny said with a tiny pout. “That's mowe than one!”

“It's just an addition to the first rule,” Daniel jumped in to help. 

“Wha'f an addifhon?” asked Dak. 

“Oy,” I sighed.

We did eventually manage to settle the squirts down. They ran out of energy by the time we ended the tour with the bathroom and I could convince them that after shave was not something to play with and no, the bathtub wasn't a slide. Once Dak and Danny had fallen asleep on my bed, safely wrapped into a soft bath towel that served as a blanket, and with pillows as a barrier so they wouldn't roll over and accidentally fall out when they woke up, Daniel and I ended up in the living room and collapsed on the couch. 

“Welcome to parenthood,” I said, clinking my beer bottle against his.

“So how does this work? They're living with you... but Danny is supposed to be my gift.”

“Maybe we can share custody,” I offered. “They can live here a week and two weeks at your place...”

Daniel snorted. “Nice try, Jack.”

“This is going to be tough,” I warned him.

“We don't have much choice, do we? Unless you want to give them back to the SGC... “

“No!” They were our gifts. Besides, I couldn't just break those little hearts. Even though they didn't have hearts, literally speaking, but that wasn't the point, right?

“They just need time to settle in. It's all new and exciting and maybe a little scary to them. Everything is so big and they are so little,” Daniel mused. “I think they're good kids. Dolls. They're just very ambitious, and they know no fear.”

“Except the fear of being separated,” I said slowly.

“You won't use that to punish them,” Daniel snapped, suddenly angry for some reason.

“Hey, I never said I would!” How cruel did he think I was? “And I won't. I was just wondering why they are so fixated on each other.” 

He took a deep breath. “Sorry, I just...” He bit his lip and shook his head before he took a large gulp of his beer. 

“Abandonment issues.”

“What?”

“You. Abandonment issues. All that foster care crap, the death of your parents.” I waved my bottle at him. “Take your pick.”

“And you turned into a shrink – when?”

“Daniel, I don't have to be a shrink to figure that one out. I don't want that either, by the way.”

“What?” He blinked. “Jack you're a bit scary today.”

“Being separated. From you.” I put my bottle on the coffee table and turned to be face to face with him, and those blue puzzled eyes. 

“That's... nice.” 

“That Bringer of Gift guy, he said we need to heal together. And the dolls would help us heal.” I had another case of words just coming out of my mouth without my inappropriate sarcasm. 

“I know, I heard him. So what's the big secret here? I lost my parents, you lost your kid, we're both pretty fucked up in the head because of what we've been through, and because of what we do. It's not as if we didn't know that before.” He gave a bitter snort. “And believe me, the last thing I want is for you to adopt me so we can get over our problems.”

“I think there's more to it. The dolls are our comfort and joy,” I continued, slowly making my way through all the things I needed to say. “Those dolls, Daniel, they think we should marry.”

“They... what?”

“For someone who's supposed to be a linguist you say 'what' a lot.”

“What has me marrying you to do with my abandonment issues and your grief over Charlie?” He looked bewildered now. “Besides, we can't. So it's a moot point.”

“Would you? Marry me?” I needed to know, it seemed to be the most important question at that point. 

'”NO!” He slammed his bottle on the table next to mine. “I mean, I would gladly venture in some forbidden dangerous relationship with you ... but I was married to Sha're. It's sacred. I don't want to do it again. Not like that.”

“Say that again,” I bleated. 

“Sha're...”

“No! The other part. About the forbidden relationship.”

He pushed up his glasses and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Ah, Jack...”

“Say. It. Again.” I needed to hear it. To be absolutely sure I didn't imagine things.

“Why? You can knock me on my ass if you want to. That's okay. I shouldn't have said it in the first place. So make it quick and then I'm gone.” He started to get up and I needed a moment to get what he was talking about. I shot up from the couch and grabbed him by his biceps. Pulling him in, hard, I dove in for a kiss. 

I waited for him to struggle, to pull back and to headbutt me. Because what he just said had to be a bad joke, nothing else, and I expected to be flying across the room any minute. Daniel isn't the lanky, skinny boy anymore he once was. He's bulky, nice hard muscles under smooth skin. My hands explored his back underneath his shirt, then my right palm moved down and landed on his ass. When he moaned into my mouth I yanked him in even harder and we crashed backwards onto the couch, body on body. 

“Jesus,” I gasped when we came up for air.

“Call me Daniel,” he leered, eyes twinkling with humor and something else. Something I'd never seen there before.

“Bastard,” I snarled and he plunged in for another kiss, his hands fisting my shirt. I didn't care if it was torn apart, nor did I care that he kicked the coffee table out of the way to have more access. 

We slid from the couch and our hands couldn't stop stroking, touching... Daniel did wondrous things with his mouth to my nipples through my t-shirt and by the time we were halfway undressed I had trouble not to come into my pants. 

“Bed,” I growled, pushing him off me. “Now.”

We hauled each other to our feet and staggered towards the hallway, when I suddenly stopped dead in my tracks. Damn. Damn. Damn. 

“We can't,” I gasped.

“WHAT?!” Daniel gaped at me. “What the hell are you talking about? If that's a joke, it isn't a good one.”

“The kids,” I groaned. “There are... dolls... in... my... bed.” And there was no chance the spare room bed would withstand two grown man having sex. It was an old small bed I bought around the time Daniel came back from Abydos so he didn't have to sleep on the couch all the time. 

“Shit,” Daniel said with feeling. “I don't believe this. Three years and now that.” 

“Three... what?” 

“I've waited three years for this,” Daniel groaned.

“Whoa. You did?” 

“Yes, as a matter of fact, I did.” He grabbed a t-shirt from the floor, but didn't put it on again. “In my heart I knew I wouldn't get Sha're back when we'd been searching for her for two years. Things seemed so... hopeless. I still wished. But... “ He gave me an almost shy smile. “I guess at first it was just the wish to be with someone. Or to fulfill a fantasy, I don't know. And it kind of grew.” 

“Well,” I grinned, recovering from the shock rather quickly. “I'm way ahead of you. I've been waiting since the day you came back.”

“From Abydos?”

“Yeah. But I'd never make a move on you. Not until those dolls... happened.”

“The dolls who are in your bed now,” Daniel groaned. “And if we stay here they might wake up and come in here and...”

“Oh, crap!” 

We lunged for our clothes, got them tangled and Daniel hit his knee at the coffee table. Finally we were dressed again. Daniel looked me up and down and burst out laughing. “You're wearing my pants,” he giggled. 

“Yeah? You're wearing mine.”

“And you've pulled on your shirt inside out, Jack.”

“You're only wearing one sock.”

We fell back on the couch, howling with laughter like two hormone driven teenagers. Well, I guess we had to channel our wanton lust into something else for the moment. I never howl with laughter. Neither does Daniel. It was a very rare occasion. 

“Shower,” I finally managed without fits of laughter.

“Shower?”

“Yeah. You. Me. Shower.” I jumped to my feet and grabbed Daniel's hand. 

“Sometimes you really have good ideas, Flyboy,” he chortled as he was hauled across the hallway and into the master bathroom.

“Shhh,” I shushed him. “We don't want to wake the babies.”

I left Daniel in the bathroom and snuck into my bedroom to make sure our little brats were asleep. They had turned towards each other and hugged, but they seemed to be in dreamland.

I softly closed the door behind me. If this thing was going to work out between my linguist and me we had to come up with strategies to catch alone time. But hey, I was Special Ops trained. Should be a piece of cake....

  
  


**Epilogue**

... “And so we brought you home and life was never the same ever since,” Daniel finishes his story just when my mind is occupied with our first showering together. I remember how we were in a kind of hurry that first time because we feared the squirts might wake up... but it was still the most thrilling sex I’d had in, oh, some time. Daniel was...

“Jack? Wanna call Sam and Teal'c now?” 

“Huh?”

“About postponing our trip.”

“Ah, yeah, sure.” I feel Dak's pants and they're still a little damp. “How about we meet for lunch and go from there?”

“Good idea. That's still early so we'll actually be able to see what kind of tree we're buying.”

“Wee iss buin' a twee?” Danny exclaims.

“I hate twees,” Dak informs me and I laugh. He probably doesn't hate trees. It's just one of the things he took over from me when the toy factory made him. Or at least that's what I'm guessing. 

“You won't hate this tree, buddy, it's a special tree.” I wink and go to call Carter and Teal'c. Plans are changed quickly and when I'm back in the kitchen Daniel is showing the squirts how to fold little origami birds from paper. 

“Big Dak, lookee, I can have mai own biewdee now!” Danny greets me.

“Sweet,” I say and watch them for a moment. 

Having the squirts here has brought out all kinds of things in Daniel I never knew he could do. Like making cookies, folding origami birdies and whittle. Yep, Daniel is good in woodwork. He made tiny archaeological tools for Danny doll for Christmas and a tiny wooden hockey stick and puck for Jack. I know the squirt wants a mini P90 – he's seen a toy gun on the Internet when we looked at little useful things for the boys – but Daniel and I are not sure if giving them guns is a good idea. 

On the other hand, these are miniature copies of us, and they can't do anything wrong with a play gun. It doesn't even really shoot, it's just to carry around and yell “Bang Bang”. Yet, my issues about kids and guns run deep, so I hope he won't be too disappointed when he gets a hockey stick instead of a gun.

I sneak out and into the bedroom to look into our Christmas box which is hidden on the highest shelf in my closet. In it I find the hockey stick, the archaeological tools and the hockey shirt I ordered for Jack at some teddy bear store. I hope it fits. We never tried to put other clothes on them yet since they're always dressed. 

There's also a little blue cap, matching the blue BDUs. And a boonie hat for Danny. I catch myself grinning like an idiot at all this. There's something about this mini stuff that touches a very soft spot inside and makes me melt. I guess that was exactly what gift-guy had in mind when giving us the squirts. I never walked around with a goofy grin on my face before we went to toy-planet. I'm doing it a whole lot lately, either because of the dolls or because of Daniel. Oh, I'm still cranky, it's just who I am, but even being cranky is more fun these days.

I put the box away and head back into the kitchen only to find it empty. Laughter and chatter is coming from the direction of the dining room so I go over there to find Daniel leaning onto the partial wall and watching the squirts run around in the living room letting their birdies fly.

“Hey,” I murmur, stepping up behind him and pressing a light kiss to his hairline. I nuzzle his neck for a moment and inhale typical Daniel scent. Soap and shampoo and the underlying note of coffee. Yep, that's it. That's something to be grateful for and if I ever meet the Deliverer of Gifts again, I'll invite him to go fishing with us. 

“Hey,” he replies softly and turns as my arms go around his middle. 

I keep an eye on the squirts who are just crawling under the recliner to retrieve one of their origamis. While they're occupied, Daniel gifts me with feather light kisses to my lips and the corner of my mouth. 

“Mmmmh, Daniel,” I ho-mmmh-er and he snorts and pulls back. 

“I'm not a donut, and, thankfully, you're not Homer.”

“You taste good though.” I give his nose a quick lick and he starts chuckling while making an 'ewww' face. 

“You're gross, Jack O'Neill.”

“Mmmh,” I try again and bite his earlobe. “Niiice.”

“Big Dak! Danwell! Aye iss stuck!!!!” That's Dak.

“Stuck where?” I ask, not ready to part from my delicious lover yet. 

“Unner the weclainew!” That's Danny.

“Both of you?” Daniel sighs and I reluctantly let him go investigate. 

“Ah-huh! Aye twied to wescue Dak.”

I watch from the dining room as Daniel crosses the room and reaches under the recliner. A moment later he pulls out two dusty dolls. Go figure. “Jack!” he yells. “You need to vacuum under there!” 

“Not today,” I answer easily. Yep, I'm getting used to this. We both are. So I get the cloth-brush and we are taking turns brushing off dust from blue pants and jackets and Daniel cleans Danny's glasses.

“You know, you could move in with me,” I say thoughtfully when we're done and the squirts are snuggled on the couch watching a cartoon. Daniel and I are back in the kitchen having another coffee.

“I don't think that's such a clever idea.”

“Why not? I need help with the monsters. It's unfair to let me handle them alone most of the time anyway.”

“They stayed with me last weekend,” Daniel objects, but he's grinning.

“And it's not as if you haven't lived here before. After you lost your apartment, when you came back from Abydos, when you got kidnapped by Nem, when you were sarc addicted... .” I go on ignoring what he just said.

“And you have no problem going to Hammond telling him you're not capable of keeping two cute little rag dolls in line?” he teases.

“The things I do for love,” I whine, and roll my eyes. “The one and only true love in my life, that’s you, Doctor Jackson. And you're making fun of me. You have no heart.” 

“Drama queen,” Daniel snorts. But when he walks over to the kitchen table for the milk, he wriggles his ass just so.

“Slut,” I counter, taking in a good eyeful.

“Oh, yeah.” He pours himself some milk and takes a sip from his coffee, then licks his lips and grins.

“Stop that,” I groan. Kissing is fine, hugging is fine. But when he does the lip or eye batting thing I'm SO gone. “Babies awake.”

We sit and drink our coffee in comfortable silence. “I'll think about it,” Daniel suddenly says.

“Sweet.” I grin. O'Neill : 1.

  
  


A couple hours later we start ‘Adventure Christmas Tree’. Danny and Dak are Aww-ing and Ohh-ing at the snow covered world. They do like snow and Janet has sewn little snow suits for them for Christmas so they can have fun outside. Carter found Baby Born snow boots some time ago, so they'll be all set for their first snow ball fight soon. However, I don't know how to keep them out of snow drifts and such, given how small they are. 

As long as we're in the truck the squirts are allowed to be in the backseat with Carter and Teal'c, sitting on their laps. Provided they don't jump, run or climb over on the passenger seat or distract me otherwise from driving. If they do that, they'll end up in their sleeping bag buckled into the Baby Born car seat I bought a few weeks ago. I'm probably the only USAF Colonel without kids who has a doll car seat in the back of his car, in pink. Why do they make all this doll stuff in pink? Daniel and I have painted little chairs, the table and the bed navy blue. Not just because our dolls are boys, but because the pink everywhere is driving us both nuts. The car seat, however, is still pink and there are little sheep on the lining. 

Today there's no need for restraints, as Teal'c calls it, as the boys are behaving perfectly. We reach our destination, a wide snow covered area near the Cheyenne Mountain woods where they're selling trees. 

“Remember not to talk in front of strangers, not to leave our jackets and not to scare anyone by suddenly chattering to people,” I rattle down the rules as the kids scramble into Daniel's and my jacket pockets so that only their little heads stick out. 

“Wee be vewy goodest,” Dak informs me.

“Wee always 'member the wules,” Danny adds.

“Let's have fun then, kids.” I lead the way as we trudge through the snow to the lines of balled trees.

“Chwistmas Twee, chwistmas twee,” Danny crows happily from my pocket. “Wee iss geddin' a weal chwistmas twee, a weal chwistmas twee, never had a chwistmas twee befowe!”

My hand finds its way to his head and gently strokes his hair. “Happy?” I ask in a low voice.

“Vewy happiest,” he informs me, grabs my hand and holds on to two of my fingers until we reach the better looking trees.

“I like this one. It's not too big and it's straight and has the right height for your living room, Colonel,” Carter points at a dark green pine tree.

“Yeah, looks great.” 

We gather around it and I look at its bark to see if there are any parasites on it.

“I believe this one would fit into your living room exactly, O'Neill.” Teal'c points at another tree. It's slightly bigger than the one Carter has picked, but there's a little extra top on the top. It looks like the treetop is split in two.

“It looks... funny,” Daniel says doubtful.

“It has twintops,” Carter says, then her face burst into a huge smile. “I have an idea, sir. You could take off one of the tops. That way the dolls will have their own little tree. We can put it into the tree stand since the big tree is balled and will be in a pot.”

She's a smart cookie, my 2IC. And apparently Teal'c had the same thought when pointing us to that tree. 

“What do you think, kids?” I address the squirts. Their heads nod so wildly, I think they're in danger of falling off.

“YAYYAYAYAY!” Dak squeals.

“Ouw own tweeeee,” Danny claps his hands in delight.

It's a done deal.

  
  


Daniel, Carter and the dolls spent the afternoon making little paper ornaments for the mini tree while Teal'c and I take care of the trees. Clipping off the second top and putting it into the tree stand with some water is easy. It takes a little longer to get the big tree into its pot and find the right spot by the fireplace. When it is where I want it, I think about where to put the mini tree. It finds a place in front of my second coffee table by the panoramic window. 

Nice.

Next step on our agenda is decorating. But the wee ones are tired and drop into their little doll bed before dinner. It's a good thing they don't have to eat. Daniel fusses with the sleeping bag and I give each little head a hair ruffle. 

“Do you think they'll love Christmas?” Daniel whispers.

“Oh, yeah. They do already.” 

“I mean... maybe it's all a bit overwhelming for them.” 

“They'll be fine, Daniel.”

“Yeah, you're right.” 

We gaze down at our babies and at this moment I'm sure it's the loveliest sight I've seen since Charlie is gone. I remember how I used to watch my son sleep when he was a baby and there's a sting, but recently the pain that always comes with the memories of my son is a little less biting, a little less harsh. I used to think I was dealing pretty well with Charlie's death ever since Daniel prevented me from killing myself along with the people of Abydos. But the truth is I was just burying Charlie deep enough so I could breathe a little easier and forget. Sometimes. 

The babies bring back the memories I had so neatly locked away, but I can now have these memories accompanied by a warm feeling and gratefulness that I had my Charlie for ten years. And there are new memories to be made now with the babies.

They may be just dolls, but they have put our lives upside down. 

Along with Daniel it's the best gift I ever got.

Fin

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> First written for the LD List and for Pat as a thank you for giving me Dak and Danny. They continue to be a joy and comfort in my life. Thank you.


End file.
